Hmm, everyone has a story to tell at one point in their life. Today, i'm leaving that story to another better day where words are harder to speak than usual and emotions are as blunt as the ruler and expressions are merely a cognitive notion which involuntarily put out to show the world how strong we are.
Lately, after that recent entry of mine, things have slowed down in terms of distance, realism, feelings, a sense of touch and another moment of solitude. Somehow, something has put out the flame inside of me. My attempts to make ends meet have never been better. Why do i bother to make north meet the south, or west meets the east for that matter? That, i just don't get myself sometimes, and everyday i open those tiresome eyes and begged that the day would give me a break for once and perhaps throw the ball in my court. Nevertheless, reality has a pain forsaken way of telling you that the worse has yet to come.
I've been poking into the past, for some reason. Many of us, have a problem moving forward and its not because we don't want to but it's because we can't. We have no visible future to look forward to but only another day of painful memories. We try to walk into the past and perhaps try to tweak things but there are 101 scenarios of me in this reality which have gone back many times. However, the future is what we make and how we deal with situational uncertainties. I have a problem comprehending that at times, i make the wrong decisions because i want to make them, even though i know what's right for me and for the situation. The best part of all, is that sometimes these wrong decisions lead to right situations which could not have happened if i had acted appropriately; because sometimes the truth has a way of playing the role of an angel.
I had a weaks worth without a mother. She went overseas and the family was stuck on a ONLY-BOYS cult. It was fun at first but the grocery shopping was just simply not-a-man's job. Take the wrapping of the vegetables for an example. I had to dig my hands into that pile of dirty vegetables and then i pondered; how was i suppose to choose? What criteria? Then came the picking of the fishes, like hell all of them looked at me with their eyes wide open, asking me to pick them because they are simply delicious. Like hell, stop staring at me, i won't buy you :) I saw this huge $160 crab, i so want that for my pet.
But i must say everybody in the family had their fair share of getting away from the lady of the family. She nags alot and makes alot of unnecessary noises. For one, the house phone was much quieter, somehow old ladies have more friends than young dudes like me. The phone keeps buzzing and buzzing and not to mention an old lady's ringtone. How retro for her age but irritating and it is worse than my alarm clock ringtone.
Lastly, to end this entry, i would perhaps like to talk about pen refills. Why do we buy pen refills? Many say a pen is more than enough to get through the days, just as long as you take good care of it. But, somehow life for me has become more than just acquiring a pen to write, but to also secure pen refills as means of 'provision of bad debts'. There's a thin line between a pen and "a-pen-with-many-refills". The rest, remains too obvious to write about, so i'm gonna leave this as open-ended as it should.
Lately, after that recent entry of mine, things have slowed down in terms of distance, realism, feelings, a sense of touch and another moment of solitude. Somehow, something has put out the flame inside of me. My attempts to make ends meet have never been better. Why do i bother to make north meet the south, or west meets the east for that matter? That, i just don't get myself sometimes, and everyday i open those tiresome eyes and begged that the day would give me a break for once and perhaps throw the ball in my court. Nevertheless, reality has a pain forsaken way of telling you that the worse has yet to come.
I've been poking into the past, for some reason. Many of us, have a problem moving forward and its not because we don't want to but it's because we can't. We have no visible future to look forward to but only another day of painful memories. We try to walk into the past and perhaps try to tweak things but there are 101 scenarios of me in this reality which have gone back many times. However, the future is what we make and how we deal with situational uncertainties. I have a problem comprehending that at times, i make the wrong decisions because i want to make them, even though i know what's right for me and for the situation. The best part of all, is that sometimes these wrong decisions lead to right situations which could not have happened if i had acted appropriately; because sometimes the truth has a way of playing the role of an angel.
I had a weaks worth without a mother. She went overseas and the family was stuck on a ONLY-BOYS cult. It was fun at first but the grocery shopping was just simply not-a-man's job. Take the wrapping of the vegetables for an example. I had to dig my hands into that pile of dirty vegetables and then i pondered; how was i suppose to choose? What criteria? Then came the picking of the fishes, like hell all of them looked at me with their eyes wide open, asking me to pick them because they are simply delicious. Like hell, stop staring at me, i won't buy you :) I saw this huge $160 crab, i so want that for my pet.
But i must say everybody in the family had their fair share of getting away from the lady of the family. She nags alot and makes alot of unnecessary noises. For one, the house phone was much quieter, somehow old ladies have more friends than young dudes like me. The phone keeps buzzing and buzzing and not to mention an old lady's ringtone. How retro for her age but irritating and it is worse than my alarm clock ringtone.
Lastly, to end this entry, i would perhaps like to talk about pen refills. Why do we buy pen refills? Many say a pen is more than enough to get through the days, just as long as you take good care of it. But, somehow life for me has become more than just acquiring a pen to write, but to also secure pen refills as means of 'provision of bad debts'. There's a thin line between a pen and "a-pen-with-many-refills". The rest, remains too obvious to write about, so i'm gonna leave this as open-ended as it should.
"You can be whoever you want to be, just as long as you remember who you really are". - frostdude
No comments:
Post a Comment