There's a phase which everyone goes through. From young, there's a poor appreciation.
When i was 7, i always have a premature look into reality. I never took things for the best of it. I looked at time from a completely different perspective. It looked more like passing minutes and days and just about getting through the hour of endless tuition and mischief. I had many exploration adventures and come to think of it, i actually came up with the idea of "drain hunting". It was a poor attempt to create what they call today "Indiana Jones" or "Tomb Raider". I had the imagination of legos and so many constructive childish ideas but seen today, it would be a success.
When i was 13, i felt the world and everyone in it hated me for my actions. Everything was flowing down the drain and i had no control of it. I was not cut out for what they call "sciences" and "maths" and all that little bits of what they call relevance today. From then till now, what i took from secondary school were simple geography and maths. I had everyone to blame but myself. I was stuck on to short thrills and poor senses of despair. And this was the time when i had no appreciation, nothing at all and mistakes changed the path of my life.
When i was 14, i failed to make that leap. It was a short period of unhappiness and dissatisfaction, knowing all my closest friends had left me for another better class. I felt that i would be doomed and stuck with the many bad eggs. They were angry and discontented, knowing my unfaithfulness and shortcomings at 13.
When i was 16, i saw alphabets and numbers which were allocated to me. Faces on the graduation day, i will never forget. They were young children heading out into the public world where uniforms do not exist anymore. I had so much to offer but was so unwilling to understand. Lost i was, it was him who picked me up. He asked me the only question which i will ask my kids in the future, "what do i want to achieve?". and i was dumbfounded because i was still in an era of poor judgment and clouded by the many make believes of high outputs and successes.
When i was 18, i was still on a path of a dark journey out of the enduring forest. I went in, only to get myself out of it on my own. I guess everybody has to, once in awhile. It was like a maze and a venture of uncertainty. Nevertheless, he held my hand as i walked every step, knowing even though they were just baby steps, but it was worth it. I opened my eyes just for a brief moment and i was in the midst of what they call a business paradise. There was so much to grasp but so little rate of acceptance.
When i was 20, the path was drawn so clearly. My mind was in sync to what he had envisioned for me when i was 16. It was those baby steps which made me realize that a part of life is the proper guidance of the person who cares most for you. I teared, knowing that out of the many choices which i've made, i chose the right choice to believe in his beliefs. I had nothing more to offer, for he did not request anything in return.
When i was 21, the world shrank to a size of weeks and months. The service had me at a close leash, but i never forgot my roots and i think no one should. Throughout the service, i made an attempt to continue to make up for my many inadequacies and frustrations. I had lost all appreciation for the ones who cared deary. I guess its normal, knowing that "me time" is always an important part of defining and building a person's character.
And today, i try to spend more time with them, knowing how much they did to make me who i am today. They always try to break my spirit, knowing that i will build the blocks of entrenchment again. They always try to raise the vocal volume, knowing that i will eventually swallow those words. They always try to threaten me, knowing that one day i would think the way they do and see what they see and feel what they feel. They always remind me, knowing that one day i would learn to remind myself of my shortcomings. They always remind me of people's failure, so that one day i would save people from their failures.
But knowing, how much gratitude i own them, i would today spare this entry for them because knowing one day, just one day i might forget what i have to say or need to say, just to thank them of the greatest things in life which they have brought for me upon my life.
When i was 7, i always have a premature look into reality. I never took things for the best of it. I looked at time from a completely different perspective. It looked more like passing minutes and days and just about getting through the hour of endless tuition and mischief. I had many exploration adventures and come to think of it, i actually came up with the idea of "drain hunting". It was a poor attempt to create what they call today "Indiana Jones" or "Tomb Raider". I had the imagination of legos and so many constructive childish ideas but seen today, it would be a success.
When i was 13, i felt the world and everyone in it hated me for my actions. Everything was flowing down the drain and i had no control of it. I was not cut out for what they call "sciences" and "maths" and all that little bits of what they call relevance today. From then till now, what i took from secondary school were simple geography and maths. I had everyone to blame but myself. I was stuck on to short thrills and poor senses of despair. And this was the time when i had no appreciation, nothing at all and mistakes changed the path of my life.
When i was 14, i failed to make that leap. It was a short period of unhappiness and dissatisfaction, knowing all my closest friends had left me for another better class. I felt that i would be doomed and stuck with the many bad eggs. They were angry and discontented, knowing my unfaithfulness and shortcomings at 13.
When i was 16, i saw alphabets and numbers which were allocated to me. Faces on the graduation day, i will never forget. They were young children heading out into the public world where uniforms do not exist anymore. I had so much to offer but was so unwilling to understand. Lost i was, it was him who picked me up. He asked me the only question which i will ask my kids in the future, "what do i want to achieve?". and i was dumbfounded because i was still in an era of poor judgment and clouded by the many make believes of high outputs and successes.
When i was 18, i was still on a path of a dark journey out of the enduring forest. I went in, only to get myself out of it on my own. I guess everybody has to, once in awhile. It was like a maze and a venture of uncertainty. Nevertheless, he held my hand as i walked every step, knowing even though they were just baby steps, but it was worth it. I opened my eyes just for a brief moment and i was in the midst of what they call a business paradise. There was so much to grasp but so little rate of acceptance.
When i was 20, the path was drawn so clearly. My mind was in sync to what he had envisioned for me when i was 16. It was those baby steps which made me realize that a part of life is the proper guidance of the person who cares most for you. I teared, knowing that out of the many choices which i've made, i chose the right choice to believe in his beliefs. I had nothing more to offer, for he did not request anything in return.
When i was 21, the world shrank to a size of weeks and months. The service had me at a close leash, but i never forgot my roots and i think no one should. Throughout the service, i made an attempt to continue to make up for my many inadequacies and frustrations. I had lost all appreciation for the ones who cared deary. I guess its normal, knowing that "me time" is always an important part of defining and building a person's character.
And today, i try to spend more time with them, knowing how much they did to make me who i am today. They always try to break my spirit, knowing that i will build the blocks of entrenchment again. They always try to raise the vocal volume, knowing that i will eventually swallow those words. They always try to threaten me, knowing that one day i would think the way they do and see what they see and feel what they feel. They always remind me, knowing that one day i would learn to remind myself of my shortcomings. They always remind me of people's failure, so that one day i would save people from their failures.
But knowing, how much gratitude i own them, i would today spare this entry for them because knowing one day, just one day i might forget what i have to say or need to say, just to thank them of the greatest things in life which they have brought for me upon my life.
"To remind them, how good they are, have been or had been". - frostdude
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