Many of my secret readers are complaining about my low frequency of updating, hmm probably because of the occasional hazardous issues and the very packed up schedule.
My changed life has taken a big flip, for I have not been charged of juggling so many abilities, responsibilities and ethics in my life. They say its a phase that one day someone will have to go through, but such a quantum leap should never be resorted.
Sigh, on another note, have u ever got this feeling of annoyance? Like the whole world is looking over you, in a bad manner. The environmental pressure is so intense these days, i couldnt make note of what changes are of relevance.
There has been a significant force that drives me back and fore whenever i make a particular decision which requires a little bit of commitment. It is like installing a game which you hope to commit and finish 100% for the next few years. I mean, perhaps my gaming styles have caused me to be in this manner, but sometimes i feel when i really need it, i want it but sometimes when i dont want it, it somehow revolves around me.
This unnatural drive has pushed me to the point that i actually do want it but when i'm in the situation, the feeling is already good enough for that moment and anything that comes after the moment, i would live to regret it and move over to another day. At times, it occurs very naturally and it releases like a normal reflex. Many say, its about finding the right cheese to mix with the right nachos, and its about finding the right flavor to mix with the drink.
And yet today, given a situation with Joell, it was practically easy to forgo, knowing that what i had in hand, was nothing more than what i had the day before, just a little feverish kick to volt my regression and annoyance.
This whole entry seems rather complicated and mysterious but that's how it should be, rather than other blogs of simply noting down what was done and what should be been done or am doing currently. I think the deepest note really counts and each entry really has something to infer.
My changed life has taken a big flip, for I have not been charged of juggling so many abilities, responsibilities and ethics in my life. They say its a phase that one day someone will have to go through, but such a quantum leap should never be resorted.
Sigh, on another note, have u ever got this feeling of annoyance? Like the whole world is looking over you, in a bad manner. The environmental pressure is so intense these days, i couldnt make note of what changes are of relevance.
There has been a significant force that drives me back and fore whenever i make a particular decision which requires a little bit of commitment. It is like installing a game which you hope to commit and finish 100% for the next few years. I mean, perhaps my gaming styles have caused me to be in this manner, but sometimes i feel when i really need it, i want it but sometimes when i dont want it, it somehow revolves around me.
This unnatural drive has pushed me to the point that i actually do want it but when i'm in the situation, the feeling is already good enough for that moment and anything that comes after the moment, i would live to regret it and move over to another day. At times, it occurs very naturally and it releases like a normal reflex. Many say, its about finding the right cheese to mix with the right nachos, and its about finding the right flavor to mix with the drink.
And yet today, given a situation with Joell, it was practically easy to forgo, knowing that what i had in hand, was nothing more than what i had the day before, just a little feverish kick to volt my regression and annoyance.
This whole entry seems rather complicated and mysterious but that's how it should be, rather than other blogs of simply noting down what was done and what should be been done or am doing currently. I think the deepest note really counts and each entry really has something to infer.
"A sign of disbelieve to be forever embedded within the deepest core of a personality". - frostdude
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