Ok, i've let this stretch over a long week or so. Life for me, has taken a steer down a road where i believe to be another crossroad which actually determines how far i actually penetrate a corporate entity and climb the ladder. The pressure is good but somehow uncertainty still knocks at my doors.... for now.

Anyway, say its because i've not been through the system but seriously local universities are having so much time for extra social activities. Well, in the sense there is all that sort of social gathering, orientation camp and competition and what not? Perhaps, i've not been induced in this local university system before, but seriously?? YES seriously, they have so much time to plan and do these out of the world time consuming stuff, and yet they complain grades are not as good. Or perhaps, i'm simply envious of what they have going on, because in my education route, i din't really have that luxury of engaging in such intensive social events such as clubs, communities, and camps. It was more of a study-only kind of environment for me. Something worth thinking about.

Well, thursday is the last exam paper which i'll ever sit for, so far. The feeling is pretty much brilliant, knowing how much i've journey through in the MDIS system. I'm literally the building blocks of the MDIS education route, right from certificate. You can say i'm the living example of their visual summary of the education route. But nevertheless, i'm definitely not gonna complete their remaining two more building blocks. This is as far as I go... for now.

I guess, these few exams have shown me that learning and experience curve really do exist in our world. I never knew I would have that chance to experience it but apparently the feeling is good. The only success story I would share is, sometimes we should simply do what we are good at, and leave the rest to outsiders. Of course, it is always advisable to start from a new disciplinary but it is better to start fresh than to start at a level which requires the state-of-the-art requirements. If i were to go into engineering, definitely i would see myself at the base of the building blocks once more; certificate. But all these, is just one step too far for me, for now...

My calender or what they might call "time table" has always brought me a sense of direction from time to time. Many people rely on a mental model to keep themselves updated of what is to come and what they might need to do. However, mental model risks a chance of a person's need to procrastinate and mentally tell himself that it can be done on another day. By actually having a proper time table, it serves as a written agreement of oneself to be committed to the time table and provides a proper overview of what is needed to be done in the day to come.

Speaking of my calender, I should be heading down to Bugis during the weekends. With a good cash in hand, I'm just gonna be a tourist and shop around for basically everything and anything which can be possibly unnecessary for me. I've always ogled at Bugis market's finger food but never had a chance to really look up close and try, due to such a busy hectic life of me. I'm gonna just spend like never before and probably enjoy the day away. I guess I'll start with Bugis market, followed by Sim Lim Square and to Paco Bugis to end it off. I guess it is a day where i actually pamper myself for what is worth, thus the need to engage in greater exercise activities this week.

And also another point to note, today I've finally let go of a personal hatred which was going on for about a year and a half. I don't know but sometimes I can't seem to let go of what is apparent to me. I'm used to carry this weight with me so much that forgiving and forgetting are never in my priority list. I guess when we are cornered, we make full use of a bad situation, using what we really got in hand; lemonade. When life gives you lemon, make lemonade.

I've been really tempted these days. Many have asked where am i heading and it seems that i've gone from bad to worse. I'm leaving this paragraph ambiguous for other readers to evaluate but somehow these days i'm chewing more than what i can actaully eat. I've gone across that thin line many times, so much that I begin to wonder if i should have ever done it. Perhaps, many would say curiousity made the cat tempted, but I see it as a breach of personal boundaries and internal coherence. The idea of ethics and grey areas cannot begin to describe the negative explorations which I've been attempting.

Of course, when i really get a new keyboard, you will hear from me much more often. Typing on this new old keyboard, has never been better. In fact, i'm beginning to get used to this keyboard which i shouldn't!! My table is clustered up with 2 keyboards!! The one which i was itchy handedly plugging keys and cleaning and of course this keyboard. I'm using the spoilt keyboard as my media center for mute and volume, super interesting from my perspective!!

I should be doing another mega spring cleaning, seeing that much of this term's study notes were actually based on previous educational level modules in which I've prepared intensively for. these previous educational notes have actually sped up my exam preparation this term, thus the need for lesser note creations. I can foresee my library of files erecting up on the shelves behind me!! I'm also thinking of getting a pet fish? Y/N?

Other than all this, the next lovely post should be about the Bugis day out! It's gonna be fabulous!!! For now, it's 4:00 am and I'm so deadmeat!!

"There are those who run the race, only to find themselves running from the naked eye of time." - frostdude